With a little help from my friends

there's a song by Simple Plan that taught me all about best friends.

i thought that i could always count on you
i thought that nothing could between us two
we said as long as we would stick together
wed be alright we'd be okay
but i was stupid
and u broke me down
i'll never be that way again

So thank you
for showing me
that best friends cannot be trusted
and thank you
for lying to me
your friendship, the good times we had
you can have them back!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
and that was my anthem for 8th grade. Because of everything that had happened.

Im a pretty trusting person. I mean, im willing to share secrets and stuff with people who i deem worthy and caring. But if i do that...then i need constant reassurance that that person isnt going to fuck me over....share my secrets with the world...ditch me when i need them....talk behind my back....go to administration, you know?

and i gues thats what im blaming on how shitty i treated Krystal last night and why today i cried all day like a three-year-old cause my friends dont love me and my mom yelled at me all day. I feel so pathetic. It seriously is the worst feeling--when u think the world hates you. and i know Krystal doesnt hate me...but sometimes i get to thinking all kinds of horrible things. and i hate that.

im sure shes sick of me too and i wouldnt be surprised if she wanted to stop being my friend. it would only prove my point.

god i hate today.

it just...it rlly makes me wanna kill myself.