Hey...i exist!

It hasnt been such a bad few weeks. really it hasnt.

I got the job. and now i work =/ but i get paid which is a very pleasant thought.

I'm still on Winter guard. we had practice yesterday which was lovely and enjoyable. Tomorrow we have practice again...and im still excited.

I actually had a horrible day yesterday.

You see, I'm sick. Really sick. I didnt tell my friends, but besides the coughing, hacking, sneezing, runny nose, and headache...i've also been getting dizzy. thats why im not at school today. i passed out last night while wlaking up the stairs. and i woke up with my mom freaking out over me as i was lying on the couch. Scenario: not good.

that was my big issue last night. Not only that but i seemed to have forgotten ALL of my homework yesterday so fuck it....i dont rlly care. My math grade [and the majority of my grades] are sooo low...im kinda worried which never happens.

This being sick thing sucks ass.

i also got pissed at krystal last night. grrrrawr. but im kinda over it now.

Here was the problem:
i do everything i can for her...not for some reward but because i genuinly enjoy making her smile and stuff. so i go completely out of my way to make her life easier...i make my mom be quiet so she can take a nap...i clean up half of our insanely messy extra bedroom so she could sleep in peace...i bring her snacks....i have my mom buy food specifically for her....i get her shit out of the bandroom before its locked...i do her religion homework for her....anytime i can i try to do my best and help her out. i have never once asked her to return the gesture because i do it cause i love her.but i tend to expect that when shes in a bad mood--she could be a little sensitive to my feelings and try not to bitch at me or be rude just because she feels horrible. or she could at least apologize and say "sorry, im just pissed right now" and stuff like that. thats all im asking for---some sort of appreciation or respect for everything i do for her. and i cant ever get that and she treats me like shit and takes complete advantage of me. im sick of it.

and now im home sick today and heres the kinda funny part;

i thought she didnt care cause i didnt get the customary text "where r u?" which she always sends when im home from school. But lucy just said that shes home sick, too...and she prolly thinks I dont care because i havent sent here a text asking "whats wrong baby?"

lol so its kinda funny. I guess i'll be texting her even though she had a serious attitude yesterday at the enhd of practice. oh well. update later..maybe